Don't Let Me Go
by i love alex
Summary: A one shot following Elena and Stefan after leaving Bonnie in the cafeteria in 2x18.


A/N: I don't really know which of them went through a tougher time in 2x18 (well Elena, obviously but his face at having to watch her basically fall apart knowing there was absolutely nothing he could do about it was heartbreaking). This starts off pretty much from where he's carrying her away from Bonnie in the cafeteria; it doesn't follow what happens on the show:

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><p>They stop walking when they reach the end of the hallway, where the lights aren't as bright and she's sniffling and trembling when he reaches down, keeping one arm tight around her waist, so he can take her shoes off. She was struggling enough as it was let alone having to stumble along in plat forms. They manage to come off her feet pretty easily but she moves to sit back down on the floor once he's got them off, her head in her hands.<p>

"Elena." He breathes, ducking down against her back, sliding his hands around her waist to lift her.

"_Jeremy_, where is Jeremy?" She frantically sobs out again, turning her head to meet his eyes and it's breaking his heart; the choke in her voice, the tears on her face. That she can't _breathe._

"I can hear him, he's fine, I promise. He's fine." He whispers but she only cries harder and he's quickly lifting her, leaving the shoes on the ground and scooping her up off the floor.

"He's fine." Stefan repeats, not knowing who he was now trying to convince as she buries her head into his neck, tugging at his jacket collar, breathing out her brother's name into his neck, "He's fine."

They've reached the other hallway, the one where if they turned right, it'd lead them right back to the gym. He's pretty sure she's not aware of this, of the music booming closer and closer towards them but knows the second she does, it'd only push her further over the edge, the one he was close to falling right off himself; he had to get her _out._

It's a bit of a struggle, a band of girls that look young enough to still be in middle school, are right by the exit door leading to the parking lot. After one catches Stefan carrying Elena in his arms, they all do and it's a mix between genuine concern and gossip as they pile around them but Stefan manages to kick open the door and push through them, covering Elena's head with his hand.

They make it about hallway across the parking lot when she starts to shudder violently, turning in his arms and he gets her down just in time for her to vomit into the grass.

A sob chokes out of her after she's finished and he's needing to bite down on his tongue just to stop his own tears because he couldn't break down now, not now when she so needed him to be the one to pull her up.

"Stefan." She moans, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

"I'm right here, okay? I'm always, right here."

And he lifts her and starts for the car again, ignoring how hard it suddenly was, to see where he was going.

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><p>She stops crying right before they reach the long stretch of driveway and it worries him more than her tears did only because it meant that the shock had finally kicked it but she unclips her seatbelt and climbs out of the car when he's got it parked, without a word, without looking at him and he follows behind her as she walks into the house because it's the only thing he can do.<p>

"Honey." He breathes when she's stopped dead in her tracks, not far from the door; he catches her just as she's swaying and she sags against his chest, her legs no longer able to keep her up right.

He helps her over to the chair by the fire, reaches over to the grab the blanket from the sofa and wraps it tight around her shoulders. She's trembling, staring out at nothing with wet tears on her face as he's lighting a match.

When the fire's lit and going, he helps her with her hair, her hands shaking too much to undo the pony tail she's got wrapped in a twist; she had complained about it giving her a headache when they were driving to the dance but hadn't wanted to take it out.

"Tea." She manages when he's finished, her eyes still glazed and Stefan bends down to the floor, brings out one hand to cup her face. He doesn't want to leave her alone, doesn't ever again want to leave her alone but she flicks her eyes to his and nods, only a little.

It's a reassurance, that she'd be fine, for a few seconds; that she just needed a few seconds to recover, that he needed them too. To bring themselves together, to let themselves fall deeper apart.

"I'll be…I'll be right back."

He stands, gently presses his lips to her hair and walks out of the room, hearing the tears already coming down her cheeks before he's even turned the corner.

He stumbles to the kitchen, misses the cup as he's pouring and almost drops it on his way back; he rests against a wall, for a moment and takes a breath; feeling like he was still moving. He's been through this before, death. Grieving. But it's the helplessness, it's the hurt, in her, it's the shock within himself that makes this one of the worst.

She's curled on the ground, right in front of the fire, when he gets back. He can't see her face but he knows that's still crying, weeping quietly into her dress sleeve. He honestly doesn't know how she managed to climb off the chair but it didn't really matter, she just needed somewhere to ground herself to.

"Elena." He starts gently, putting the cup of tea on the table, coming down to the floor; he tenderly puts his hands at her back, "Come on, let's go upstairs, take a shower, lay down in bed."

"I don't want to lay down."

It's the first thing she's said in over an hour and it literally breaks out through her mouth and she lets out a deep sob even as he's rolling her onto her back to make it easier to pull her into his arms.

But she's pushing him away and climbing off his lap, almost stumbling right over to get to her feet.

"I need," She stutters suddenly, her eyes widening, "I need to go find Caroline, to tell her."

She moves so quickly he misses her leg when he grabs for it and he stands himself, rushing around the table to get over to where she was, almost at the front door.

"Elena, you need to stay here."

He knew that this was coming, that she would, sooner rather than later, think of Caroline; voice aloud the need for her; he should've expected that she would've wanted to go to her.

She shakes her head, wipes her nose with the back of her hand, "No no…no, I need to find Caroline, I need to tell her…I need to tell her that Bon-" He's grabbing for her waist as she's scrambling to push him away.

"You need to stay here." He repeats softly as she struggles in his arms.

"Just….let me go, Stefan, let me go." She cries and stops moving, her chest expanding as openly as he was crushing against it and she lets out a wail, her sob caught in her throat, her hands digging into his shirt, clawing into the fabric, "I can't do this, I can't…I can't."

"I know, "He whispers, squeezing her, "I know, I know."

And he kisses the side of her face again and then again, leans his head there, "I'll do it for you."

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><p>It takes her a little while to breathe evenly, even after Damon explains what the plan had been, even after she's seen Bonnie for herself, heard her voice. Even after she's lying in Stefan's bed, wearing his shirt, curled against his chest. He's brushing her hair back and watching her trying but failing to fall asleep.<p>

"What are you thinking about?" He asks her; regardless of the fact that Bonnie was alive, this day would be permanent, would be a scar embedded in each of them, for a while and he's worried about that, about her.

She turns a little, looks at him for a moment before she speaks, "I don't know what I would've done without you."

He wriggles down so he's lying on his side facing her. He kisses her nose and then her cheeks. Her forehead and then her lips.

"I love you." She breathes when they've broken apart and she's breathing heavily, evenly, deeply into his shoulder.

"Thought you might've forgotten." He mumbles, bringing one arm around her, finding her toes amongst the sheets.

"Like I could forget." She whispers as she's closing her eyes.

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><p>AN: I'd just like to make a general note and say the fic ideas/prompts I receive from you guys are so appreciated, I unfortunately don't have a lot of time to write at the moment but each one is written down to be remembered. I don't forget about them, promise, haha.


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